


Who needs a metal bikini?

by Gallanco732



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Crack, Finn likes to watch, Fluff and Crack, Inspired by Art, Multi, Pet Names, Poe has been out-charismaed, Rey is a butt person, Rey-nbow, Sex Pollen, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, Supreme Stud, fan art inspired, huttsmut, please give it a chance, poe is turned on by naked Kylo, proud boner, sexed up kylo ren, slightly nsfw, stupid fun, this is hilarious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-28
Updated: 2018-09-28
Packaged: 2019-07-18 16:46:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16122665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gallanco732/pseuds/Gallanco732
Summary: Inspired by a hilarious artwork by http://clara-gemm.tumblr.com/ in which the rebels are most surprised to find Kylo Ren as a chained up, scantily clad sex slave at the Hutt palace.





	Who needs a metal bikini?

 

“He’s incredibly strong, but if we take him by surprise we may have a chance,” Rey warns her allies solemnly as they prepare to raid the Hutt palace.

They’ve received intelligence that the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren himself is here alone on a covert mission to persuade the Hutts to give up the Resistance.

“My strength and his are matched. I’ll hold him off then the greater forces can move in for the capture,” Rey worries her bottom lip. She doesn’t want to kill him. It took her quite a while to convince them Ren was worth more alive as a bargaining chip than dead.

“We can do this,” cheers Poe.

“Yeah, that Bastard will pay,” chimes in Finn with a fist pump.

“Let’s move,” says Rey.

The pieces are set, they sneak their way into the palace, Rey knocking people unconscious as they move through the dark, gaudy corridors. Finally they approach the throne room, each taking position at a different entrance. Poe and Finn have agreed to go in first as a distraction.

They whisper to each other in their coms, “ 3, 2, 1!”

“Ahhhh!!” The men storm in through opposite doors into the Hutt throne room. The sight the greats them is perhaps more terrifying than any they could have ever imagined.

“Oh, you’re finally here,” comes the deep, sultry voice of Kylo Ren, clad only in tight golden short shorts and golden gloves, laying splayed seductively across the pudgy green tail of Rotta, son of Jabba.

“What the kriff!” shouts Finn.

Poe has more trouble with words, “Wha... wha... whaaa…”

Ren props himself on an elbow, the muscles of his impossibly broad chest and swole arms rippling and glistening with some kind of baby oil that’s rubbed all over him.

“FN-2187, I should have known,” Ren says matter-of-factly, an uncharacteristic grin on his face. 

“Oh, and it’s the pilot,” his smile only widens. “Pilot you surprise me, you like this way more then he does.” 

Poe sputters and drops his weapon as Finn looks wildly at his friend. Poe waves his hands frantically as Finn shoots him an accusatory glare -- Just then Rey burst in through the back doors!

“Reeeeen!!” She roars!

“Surrend...ah... uh...??? *squeak!*” She halts mid swing with her lightsaber up and her eyes bulging out of her head.

“Is that you my angel?” Ren calls wistfully behind him. “Thank the force. I won’t be needing your services any longer slug thing,” he puts his arm on the Hutt’s tail and the worm creature rolls back with a rumbling groan, flopping unconscious on the palace floor.

“What sorcery is this?” Screams Finn.

“Where are your clothes!?” Shouts Poe.

Kylo Ren looks back at the pilot and fixes him with a roguish grin. Ren rises, taking a few steps towards the rebel men, every vein and muscle glimmering, but his searing dark eyes peer directly into Poe’s wide, startled ones.

“Well, then should I start with you?” He croons deeply.

Poe opens and closes his mouth like a fish, making sounds like a broken land speeder. Finn is frozen in horror.

“Ben??” 

Rey’s voice cracks with incredulity. She hasn’t moved from her frozen stance, lighted saber held high above her head, huge unblinking eyes fixed on his tight, toned behind as he approaches her friends.

Kylo winks down at Poe and Poe feels himself flush from head to toe, frozen even without the force, at the sight of the evil space Adonis before him.

“Ladies first then,” Ren smirks. He turns to head back to Rey, then stops, looking over his shoulder at Finn.

“You,” he says pointing to the former storm trooper, “you’d like to watch wouldn’t you.”

Finn nearly explodes in embarrassment and finally finds his voice.

“Kriffin hell, cut the crap Ren you’re coming with us!”

“Well I’m cuming with someone, we need to decide the order...”

“Ah, uh, I, hnggg,” Poe can’t understate how impressed he is. He’ll have to save that line for later.

“What’s wrong with you? Are you drugged?” Cries Finn as he holds up his weapon and desperately tries to get control of this spiraling situation.

Ben turns his eyes back towards Rey and fixes her with a predators gaze. She nearly craps her pants.

“Something like that,” says Ren as he begins to stalk his prey.

“Stop,″ shouts Poe, finally coming to his senses and picking up his weapon, pointing it at Ren’s back. 

The scantily clad Supreme Leader looks back a moment then waves his hand with a powerful force suggestion. “Why don’t you two get started?”

Poe and Finn look at one another... and a moment later they’ve leapt into each others arms! Kissing passionately they begin to tear at each other’s clothing, moaning their content.

Kylo Ren saunters up to Rey who is backing up through the doorway, lightsaber STILL above her head. He spreads his arms wide, each hand gripping an opposite end of the doorframe as he towers above her,, spreading his hulking glittering body before her like the most beautiful and regal peacock in all the galaxy. 

“How would you like me sweetheart?” He rumbles and Rey’s back hits a wall.

“You’re not yourself. You’re drugged or something.”

“Or something,” he murmurs with that piercing gaze, walking towards her again.

Rey squeaks and her saber sparks as it collides with the wall behind her. Ren flicks his wrist and easily sends her weapon flying. 

“Woops, that’s dangerous, naughty Jedi.”

Rey stumbles down the hallway and Ren follows her slowly.

“Should I teach you proper saber work or should I punish you instead?”

Rey is trying to formulate a response, but trips over the body of a sleeping guard.

Huge, powerful, sweet smelling arms envelop her, breaking her fall. The Supreme Stud crowds all of her space until they’re wrapped up in each other in a corner of the corridor. 

“You want me, you’ve always wanted me,” he whispers oh so deeply into her ear. 

Electricity pulses through her body as something else plunges in her lower belly. She’s catching fire and it’s not just the heat of his impossible muscles all around her. 

“I...I... not like this,” she tries to say breathlessly.

But then she feels his soft, hot, plush lips on her skin.

He gets to work with slow, wet kisses on her neck. Unwittingly, her fingers wander across that rock hard chest. He lifts her up and she wraps her arms around his neck and her legs around his hips. He continues his assault across her clavicle, over her throat and on to the other side of her neck. It’s so good, it’s soooo good, Holy shit in the Jakku sun, it’s phenomenal. but...

“I’ve wanted you so badly, my Rey-nbow.”

“Uggghh,” Rey blanches at the gross miss-use of her name. It’s enough to bring her back to her senses. This is not right!

She can’t do this, she must heal him, she has to take this influence away. Rey’s learned a little bit about healing from the ancient Jedi texts. She must give it a try, her honor and her virtue and sanity are on the line!

Summoning every ounce of self control she’s ever possessed Rey runs her hands through his silky black locks, and pours her light into him. “Ben!”

There’s a flash and the next thing she knows she’s flat on her back on the floor and he’s laying over her. The topless (and bottomless) Supreme Leader supports himself above her on his elbows.

He looks at her darkly, wild midnight locks falling over his face. His broad chest rises and falls with every breath, but it’s his eyes that steal her heart. Dark, vulnerable, open and pleading.

“Rey?”

She forgets how to breathe, but before she can push him back he does the unexpected. Ben lowers his mouth onto hers. It’s warm and soft and heavenly, but she thinks she must have failed to heal whatever sex drug he was under.

“It didn’t work,” she says sadly as he lifts up breaking the kiss. 

His lips make their way to her ear lobe and it’s there he whispers, “It did.”

It’s like a shot of fire straight to her groin!

She gasps and turns to look in his eyes again. She finds mischief and unbridled hunger. _Oh yes!_

Their mouths crash together, repressed passion pouring out in waves. Rey can barely breathe and she barely wants to, all she wants are those lips and those strong calloused veiny hands and everything else he keeps hidden under that... oh!

She feels the product of their passion poking her in the thigh and Rey makes a very important realization.

”What happened to your shorts!?” 

“Your force healing blew them away.” 

They stare at each other, red faced and hair muffed up. Rey’s mind is racing when...

“Ooooh Poe... it’s like I’ve always dreamed.”

REy snorts, laughing at the sounds of ecstasy from her two friends in the throne room and meets Ben’s eyes with a pretty blush and curiosity in her eyes.

“I’ve been trying to get them to do that for the last year,” she says.

“There’s something I’ve been wanting to do for the last year as well.”

“On one condition,” she says softly seductively. Ben’s face turns deadly serious as he hangs on her every word.

“Don’t ever call me Rey-nbow again.”

The Supremely naked Leader smirks and sweeps his Rey up into a bridal carry. He brings one gloved hand up to his mouth to tear it off with his teeth when Rey stops him with her hand.

“No,” she whispers, “leave it on.”

With that he carries her away to find a private quarter of the palace to have his way with his Jedi queen, his proud boner wagging as they march away.

THE END!

 


End file.
